In the car with my brother. His CD went from 2pac to Taylor Swift. I'm concerned. It wasn't a mistake, he knows all the words.
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
how ive managed to spend 100$ at an open bar is beyond me.
had a convo with my professor before class while peeing... new level of awkward or a breakthrough in our relationship? i feel like there is no longer a professional boundary.
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
side note. good thing you didn't come to drunk breakfast. we were judged by children.
As one final fuck you to the courthouse i'm paying the rest of this ticket with sacajawea coins.
You convinced her to break up with her boyfriend, made out with her all night, got her to buy us all shots then went home with a different girl...
That explains the "i hate you" text. But the facebook deletion is a bit harsh
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Both guys that I'm dating were waiting for me in the parking lot after work. Literally the most awkward situation I have ever been in
She fucked the dishwasher AND the manager.
Well, she isn't a classist. You've got to give her that.
Randomize
