if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Someone shit on the floor
my boobs are a 3G dead zone. as soon as i take my phone out of my bra, it has a signal again.
I just saw some girl with the liscense plate "OBVIII"...I never wanted to get in a car accident so badly.
hows a nice way to say "yeah i would go to your dorm, but it's snowing and I know you're not going to blow me, so what's the point"?
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
I brought him to this party even though we're not together anymore because we made a bet on who would have sex first, and it is a sausage fest up in here.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
If you haven't seen a huge black man in tiny red snowflake shorts that barely cover his dick, then you don't know what I'm going through.
Don't forget ur talking to the master juggler. Remember that time I slept with 3 guys and made them all pay for plan b? Paid the rent didn't I?
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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