Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
It was amazing what she could do with her one good arm.
is there an easy way to say "i didnt plan on sleeping with you until i saw how drunk you were" ?
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
Nicole, you can't keep coming over at 3am wanting to build igloos.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
Can we just ponder our lives for a second.
No I think my brain may implode in a puff of cocaine and sparkles.
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
I mean it was like cry my eyes out or masturbate in my moms bathroom.
Just a heads up... Don't get high and attempt to do your own taxes
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Bitch, he is not your friend and this is not Bravo. Get in this car before you get smacked
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
Let's go buy marshmallows and play chubby bunny until we feel alive again
Randomize
