Just soaked up some whiskey with a paper towel and then squeezed it into a cup for consumption. New low.
You found Muppets From Space a little too intense, so you just sorta sat on the ground and stared at the wall plug for an hour and a half.
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
I just googled if crying burns calories
Going to.goingto.gtoing to DIE DIE DIEEEE......i feel like everyeone impotrant in my life like MLK is judging me.... saddd day
So I peed on what I thought was a wall while in nashville come to find out while running from the cop it was just a dark tinted window and the while bar witnessed me peeing
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
True. So did you hook up with pasta or the ultimate warrior
Little bit of both
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
Randomize
