Oral text is very safe with the right protection.
Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
My dad just walked in on me screwing the chick from the bar...the look of relief on his face was sort of hurtful.
I need a secretary to manage my drinking schedule.
and if my full six pack comes in by Halloween there is no stopping the man slut costume. I have no shame
when someone at the bar asked you a question all you knew how to say was "chug-a-lug"
Just ran into her dad at the strip club. He bought me a dance. I think i found a winner.
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
im far more worried about your salsa intake than your weed intake
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Why would you get kicked out?
Well, an overweight man is currently not wearing a shirt. Or pants. And is getting in touch with his inner Chippendale. You can probably fill in the blanks.
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
I love Texas men! TSA agent found my vibrator, nodded approvingly, and said, “You have a nice night, ma’am” with a cowboy accent. I almost made out with him on the spot
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