I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
When you went through airport security you asked if the could check if a baby was in there. That drunk.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Aside from the slim chance of pregnancy, I'm gonna call last night a raging success.
Boys DO look like their dicks. Its like dogs.
He just asked me if I'd be interested in couples therapy. Fuck my life.
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I'm going to start referring to my liver is Livy. I feel like if I give it an affectionate nickname it will hate me less. Livy isn't ready for syllabus week.
I think we all know your liver needs a man's name.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
It was a frighteningly large penis to say the least
No pussy. I don't care what time of year it is you do not look tough wearing sandals. Honestly you look like a high school guidance counselor.
Randomize
