carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
Somehow she slept thru the vacuuming, people walking in and out, and the sound of constant beer bottles hitting the trash, but when someone said weed in a regular volume of voice she startled awake.
When you awake you'll realize that your car is missing....just know that I had it and becuz of your car I hooked up with the hot bar tender that looks like that guy from bay-watch however I parked it in a loading zone and it was towed...that sex was TOTALLY worth it love you
HOW DID YOU END UP IN THE BATHROOM WITH A DANCER AFTER 12 MINUTES?
I want him in the "you're a terrible idea and are probably going to get me killed by my parents, my siblings, and my boyfriend" way
im still going. this is my new reality. also. dont take glowsticks in the bath. they explode. actually. do. it. its beautiful.
i dont think thats healthy man...
My phone just autocorrected 'vagina' to 'vaginihilation'...when exactly did I need to convey total annihilation by lady parts??
There is blood on my sheets, we apparently used 8 towels, everything in my shower is knocked down. Wut?
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
McDonald's and a car nap. I feel kinda human
Damn victory sex feels great
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