I Bought a bracelet with bible characters and a charm broke. the virgin mary one. Do you think it's a sign?
Where are I am going home with Ryan
I don't know who this or Ryan is but it is probably too late to talk you out of it
found a strand of your hair in my car. it's 1 ft 7 inches long
wtf you measured my hair?
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
It was confusing and full of hummus
i threw up on the table at the pizza place and peed in her room mates closet. i wouldnt invite me back either
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Sexy intern needs to have caveman sex with me
As your friend, who loves and cares for you, I have to be honest. I am judging you so VERY hard right now. Sorry.
Well I'm back. Could you fill me in on what I missed?
You don't want to know. Trust me.
Can't be considered a walk of shame if you pick up donuts on the way home
I miss all the tiny banana hammocks... When can I go back to ogling? I can do it from a lot farther than six feet without any complaints.
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