the vacuum is drunk
what?
i spilled my drink and tried to vacuum it and now the vacuum is drunk
Were taking tot shots. If toddlers could drink these are the size of shots they would take
Don't be offended. I can't even stand sleeping next to my dildo after I'm done, let alone a whole person.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I can coach you back to consumption. Think of it kinda like Rocky II.
I think I just ate eggs off of a plate covered in cocaine.
true... I just kept thinking "THAT IS A PENIS. OMG THAT IS A PENIS. DOES HE KNOW IM STARRING? STOP LOOKING. OMG THIS IS AWKWARD. PENISSSSS"
I'm pretty stoned, and for a second I forgot that I'm not actually Barbie and I was getting excited about all the fun we were going to have on my jet.
I immediately retract my statement involving hylecopters being allowed to blow up sharks out of the water.... The idea if it is super incredible but ultimately it would be cruel and unessesary
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Nothing says "i love you" more than flowers and potatoes
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
we're having rib night followed by a cultural enlightenment party
whats a cultural enlightenment party
we eat nachos and drink margaritas and tequila till we pass out
Well. I think my red tank top is jinxed. this is now the second time it's gotten jizz on it.
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