Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
Just lost my virginity while listening to rick astley. torn between horror and jubilation
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
Just watched a fat girl on a scooter run into the back of a bus head first
You are the luckiest man alive
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
it took us a while to figure out sex on a tire swing, buuuuuuuut MISSION ACCOMPLISHED
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
All she has to do is text me and my dick gets hard. It doesn't matter what it's about. Last text was about a homeless dude
I'm going to write a new song and call it "Did I wax my vagina for this?" remind me to never go across the country for a penis ever again.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
Randomize