There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
when she said she's going upstairs to put her "play clothes" on, I knew either she was a pervert or a kindergarten teacher. Either way, I wasn't going to leave. She's a pervert by the way.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
dude there is absolutely no room for a slide in our room
Lol I just left. He's funny and he's cute. Downside: he thinks he can outdrink us
He started doing the gator chop at my vag and said he couldn't wait to "chomp" on it later...and I still slept with him. I hate gainesville.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
You told your mom that it was your second day sober. I think she believed it until you jumped off the balcony
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
Having weed delivered to your door is like having your own personal Santa Claus
you know that australian accents are like the bat signal to my vagina
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
Hey sorry if you felt me holding your hand in the middle of the night I was actually just checking you had a pulse
Listen all we did was not even pretend we aren’t each other’s type and live together and constantly encourage each other to get laid for 6 months.
Idk how it devolved into us fucking.
Randomize
