He's totally hot and awesome. And he's a Democrat
Good, so he won't mind when you kill the baby.
if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
i just hope all the shady shit stops so i can let him into my pants
Tonight has been like a good ass fucking high school movie
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
You peed for a solid 5 minutes last night and turned around halfway through to give everyone watching a thumbs up
you told me to make out with him to promote the social success of the sorority
It's cheaper then a lap dance and you get your hair cut.
don't worry i just saved a song to my personal usb drive to give to the dj at the bar. he's playing old school jlo whether he likes it or not.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Honestly I will go to church for him, I will even try to quit smoking for him. But his dick is not worth losing alcohol. He sure as fuck isn't taking away our wine nights.
He probably thinks you're playing hard to get.
Hard to get?? I'm playing leave me the fuck alone.
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
I'm gonna buy my dress an hour before wedding. You know, just to make sure it's gonna really happen.
T'would be a shame to waste that open bar though. They shouldn't do that to us. We've been having to pretend we're happy for two people who got engaged a week after they met.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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