I hope mine doesn't look like that
I just got a ticket for the snow penis we made in our front yard.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Turns out shot glasses hold the perfect serving of sour patch kids....I still fail to see how not having any real glasses is an issue
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
you goin out tonight?
who is this.
your orgasm for tonight
Dude, it could be so much worse. That Dale kid lost a toe I think.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
I woke up still drunk to a beautiful tattooed columbian man making me pancakes. How's your memorial day?
It's almost sad. It's like the Harambe of vagina stories really.
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
They left a cherry picker with the keys in it on a college campus, what else were we supposed to do?
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Randomize
