there needs to be a "man fax report". like car fax. type in the guys name and bday and up pops all the bad shit he's ever done.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Dont ask, hes out back rolling around in the yard freaking out. literally just had a 15 minute conversation, only word i could make out was "yellow"
I was just tagged in a picture with a bunch of people i don't know in a house i don't recognize wearing a purple cowboy hat and a boa...i hate tequila
the fat lady is now rubbing her stomach and staring at me. I hate trains
best eviction party ever.
it wasn't an eviction party you asshole, you just happened to get yourself evicted during the party.
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
I was planning out a scrapbook to memorialize my affair.......and that's when it hit me, I don't make good choices. On the upside, the scrap book came out great and I am glad I saved all the gate passes from the airport.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
It's a shame I've been hooking up with him for 6 months and he still doesn't know my real name.
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