The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
I'll probably hate you when I'm sober
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
she passed out facedown in my lap while I was playing piano. 11 years of piano lessons finally paid for themselves.
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
I'm pretty sure we organized our beer pong teams according to who's been circumsized...
Oh you know, we just bobbed for apples in a bucket full of jungle juice. So, a casual Tuesday night.
You went full blown lifeguard... You wouldn't let me sleep until I was in the safety position, so I wouldn't die in my sleep...
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I got the job! The hiring manager is the sister of a guy I slept with so its like I'm a real adult now
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
