The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
Is it proper Ass-Fingering-Etiquette to tell her u felt her poop or just pretend it didn't happen?
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
I can't tell if I'm still on the hangover from last night, or if I'm experiencing the one from tomorrow, because it was so powerful that it actually traveled back through time...
Rather than admit to myself I've spent $756 at the bar this month, I'm just going to pretend I gave it to a homeless person...kind of makes me feel better.
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Why did my mother make you get naked?
I just hooked up with the German exchange student who doesn't speak English. And you said I have no talent.
That ass isn’t going to eat itself.
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
Randomize
