Wooohooo! I'm sitting in the car like a creep watching people walk in and out of Blush. Lots of happy people.
at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
All I remember is him trying to go down on me, but I guess I was too busy making out with his brother
It's not a good night until someone eats a bagel covered in face mask thinking it's cream cheese
I just woke up in bed, rolled over, and found a whole pizza.
this is the second day in a row.
Oh. Yeah. It's the same pizza then.
Itll be like a collage of penis. And not that abstract, one penis in a big painting contemporary shit. Collage....
Is it weird that the girl he dated after me had a child with him and it has my name? I think it means he's not over me. Or I'm really self absorbed...
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
I just used bulldog clips for nipple clamps. Also, a wooden spoon as a paddle. DYI Domination or Ghetto Bondage?
If there's a nuclear war you can come over. I'll feed you soup and you can rig up car batteries to power the coffee pot and toaster. We can grow tomatoes and chickens.
Randomize
