It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
im glad we only fight about serious things like the hills and disney scene it
just found my diary from when i was 14. i demand a drinking game of this.
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
I had to help you off the toilet floor because you couldn't get up, then you threw your drink on the floor and just said "oh dear" really calmly.
but I'll probably watch some porn later so it's not a complete waste of a Saturday night.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
Dude are you being arrested? I swear I just saw you laying on the hood of your car with a cop patting you down...
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
I think I was just recruited to join a religious lesbian cult by these 3 really pretty girls and I'm tempted to join
The last time I went out with these guys I won an iced tea maker from a drag queen.
you said you were going to the bathroom. we found you an hour later laying in the backyard clutching a bottle of vodka while singing the beatles and crying
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