I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
Your braces fetish is going to end up biting you in the dick.
so i don't know how many beers it takes to make a recliner look like a toilet, but that's how many i had.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
After she asked if she could try to fit her toe ring around it, i decided to leave. Thats the life i live
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
He interrupted me giving him head to ask if I were hungry, because he wanted to eat pizza. Wtf.
You wouldn't put pants on to see my parents.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
