now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
you wouldnt answer to anything but devil's advocate all night.
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
I just got a facebook invite to join a group called "bring back the old franzia spout." i never want our generation to grow up.
A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
There was a photo of his face glued to a lifesize Kim Kardashian cutout. By the end of the night he was doing shots out of medicine cups and making everybody hug it goodbye.
All i know if I'm throwing uo into a bag with a smiley facE on it right now and this is not a smileuy face time right nowe
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
we were making out in my truck and while she was straddling me she informs me that she jerks off horses for a living. Should I be concerned or flattered?
I texted him a series of texts in which the first letters of each text spelled out "WE SHOULD HAVE SEX". If that's not dedication to the dick, I don't know what is
be right there i have to get my cape
I'm trying to watch Chicago PD and tell you I like your dick at the same time. It's a lot of work, ok?
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
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