Did you draw a mustache on my drivers license picture??
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
i normally make it a rule to leave when white people start rapping... but they had blow.
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
want the rest of his teeth to fall out while he slowly dies alone. Pretty sure I'm to the anger phase.
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
It was all going great until he pulled the hamburger meat out of his pocket
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
You may be in san diego, but I just watched a guy in a wheelchair sing walking in memphis for karaoke. Check and mate.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
you tried to make the parrot smoke your joint
You know you're drunk when you have to be picked up out of a bathtub.
How high are you rn
Well I just ate a cheesecake straight from the box with a fork and now I’m laying upside down in a recliner chair seeing if I can Uber eats Doritos
So not that high
Randomize
