Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
Gave the kid in the wheelchair at the bus stop a beer and proceede to lift him on the bus. porch drinking brings out the best in everyone
By midnight I was dipping doritos in frosting...that's how my simmer break diet is going.
Mike is worried about me going on a cruise in June without him....how cute he thinks we are going to last till June
Somebody found our where I was and called the bar looking for me. When the bartender called my name I finished my beer and took off like a fugitive.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
I'm gonna have to kick a girl scouts ass...
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
Happy Father's Day to the first man I called Daddy while cumming.
On a side note, my ex husband offered to buy me shrooms
I had to take on your role as drunk idiot....I have no idea how you do it so well and so regularly. That shit is exhausting.
Randomize
