I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
yeah my walk of shame consisted of driving on the wrong side of the road at 6am still drunk with cum drying in my hair and left eye.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
We're 17 hours into a 3 day weekend, and he's already shitfaced. He fell of the dock TWICE and insisted on wearing a life jacket on dry land.
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
I knew full well that at some point during the night my penis would be out with this costume choice
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
I DONT KNOW HOW I'M NOT DEAD, JESUS CHRIST ON A DOUBLE DECKER FUCKING KEANU REEVES BUS
I got kicked out of the E.R. for saying "balls".
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
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