Made out with some random "plus sized" young lady. She let me kiss her boobies. It was like I was 6 months old again.
bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Someone told me that drinking would get me no where in life. Drinking has gotten me everywhere in life.
Word to the wise: do not smoke before going grocery shopping with only 12 bucks. So stressful.
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I'm customer of the month for a 3rd time now at the Wine store. I've achieved so much in my life
please don't go to jail. I'd hate to have to call the montgomery county jail every time I need sex advice
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
You are the human incarnation of a drinking problem
I think I had sex with a seagull last night. The window is open and there a feathers everywhere.
Want to sleep. Also want to see Alex on MDMA doing really stupid shit. Choices...
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Randomize
