Don't worry I'll hold the wheel while you cum
You know its been a rough night when you wake up and the first thing you remember is your mom going skinny dipping.
You seriously don't know?He was trying to arrest you and you were shouting that you were being punk'd. Punk'd? that show got cancelled like 5 years ago.
Hold on. She's wrapped herself in toilet paper and is scaring the dog.
Too many margaritas?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
It's hard to be a gentleman when a girl pauses her karaoke version of "a whole new world," and proceeds to tell the entire bar that she wants your cock in her mouth.
If taco bell and midol can't fix her, she's in gods hands now.
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Do u like your dick pics shot in hotdog or hamburger orientation?
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
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