I wonder if u can grow weed on Framville and sell it to Mafia Wars?
saturday- my day is open, my legs are not. you in?
well apparently not.
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I just made bacon chili cheese fries for dinner...someday my kids are going to realize I'm a stoner & this will all make sense
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
We are going all out this weekend. My liver is already smiling.
RE-DICK-YOU-LUSSSSS
That's me emphasizing the ridiculous
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
HEY JUST FOUND A SHIT TON OF MONEY IN THE PURSE HE SENT BRB GONNA GO BUY ME SOME MALE STRIPPERS AND BATHE IN THESE TWENTY DOLLAR BILLS
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I guess it's part of life. Sometimes your ex boyfriend becomes a drag queen.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
He’s tiny, hairless and humps my leg when he wants sex. He’s basically a chihuahua
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