Let's roleplay tonight. I'll be drunken diva and you be sexy sober.
IF that's your way of making me dd then count me out.
i dont even know how to be here
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
If he really loved his girlfriend then he'd wear a condom when he fucks me.
I legit just woke up on my couch, snuggled up next to some guy who's wearing my roommate's pink bathroble. What the fuck do they put in those shots?
Worst walk of shame everrr. Hopefully the thought of me walking 20 minutes in the freezing cold with someone else's sweatpants, a bra on & high heels will cheer you up today.
Oh god there are people jogging. Fuck off productive people, you don't know me.
Unless you've also woken up wearing a poncho and a ring pop, I suggest you don't judge me. Okay, I even judged myself for that.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Our first kiss happened while shot gunning a hit from a gravity bong. Its that type of relationship.
The only difference between us and a pack of 14 year old girls is substance abuse
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
Long story short wrist restraints, Apple Watch and cumming all don’t mix
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