The child next door sounds like he's having vigorous sex in the backyard and it's making me very, very uncomfortable. I don't want to look.
she looked like she should be chained to micheal vicks radiator
New first...just saw an entire family of homeless hitch hikers...kids and all. God, i love Oklahoma!
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
i don't even specifically remember last night, it's just one big wonderful lesbianic blur.
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
130 PACKAGES of glow sticks! The going rate of a rave is $38.30! GET READY FOR THE GLORGY!!!!!!!!!!!!
Just did a keg stand the dropped my phone in the toilet. Sorry for partying.
You did a keg stand on the toilet?!
I hate having to put a bra on before I go home cuz I have to pretend I actually went to class today
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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