just realized i've hooked up with 3/4 of the guys here COOL
Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
The streak lives on, still havent been to Towson without throwing up
She got subburned last week and her bikini ties in the middle...when I took off her shirt, there was a sunburned bow between her boobs. Like a present. Happy birthday to me!
as I was walking out the door her and her roommate started singing "toot it and boot it".. I'm in love
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
It's just good to know that when I drink like a twenty year old I still act like one.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
Dude, that was like bongs ago.
I woke up this morning and I had the absolutely horrific realisation that I am the human incarnation of scrappy doo
Why is there cereal literally EVERYWHERE?
It didn't follow directions.
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
A condom just fell out of me. Happy Tuesday.
Randomize
