She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
it's all fun and games until somebody pulls the tampon string..
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I just want some dick and chicken fingers please advise
You fist bumped my dick last night saying good game. That you'll be back for the 2nd game...
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
THERE'S MORE TO LIFE THAN JUST MISSIONARY
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Last night was a bad idea. I'm hungover and the contents of my purse smell like Korean BBQ.
Randomize
