i'll give you all the meat in my fridge in exchange for 2 condoms.
I never thought that I'd ever use the phrase "and the resulting ice cream explosion" seriously at work...
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
I opened a jar of Ragu so I could use it as a cup. You tell me how it's going.
Aside from the fact that there's a penis in my mouth, that's a pretty good picture of me
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
ELLEHCIM
NYRMAK
DRAHCIR
WHAT??
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Tonight I learned to never try to impress your ex by dancing on the stripper pole while drunk. That’s how you end up in the ER
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
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