I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
You bring the bicep workout. I'll bring the unscented gentle products. We'll both bring our penises.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
hey tell your friend im sorry for licking his mouth, that was probably inappropriate
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
We could have casual sex if you want. But I can't offer a bromance to a woman.
I don't know, I think having hemorrhoids shows character. You have to be trying pretty hard to get them.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
Alcohol won't break your heart. I mean, unless it's all gone maybe
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
I’m drunk and naked and looking for my charger - title of my autobiography.
she crawled a good forty meters just to whisper in my ear... "dildon't"
Randomize
