so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
By the way, I think my next facebook status update will read, "Aaron recently found out Vanessa's a screamer."
oh god.
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
One good thing about being a mom now, I can tell which guys I'm dating were breastfed and which weren't... By the way they latch on to my breast during sex! Kinda kills the mood.
Sorry blacked out and lost my phone. Judging by the looks of my body I fought a cat and fell into a bush.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
so in case you needed a ticket for the Hot Mess Express, I'm the conductor now.
His dog ate the vibrator. The WHOLE vibrator. We spend the morning after trying to make it vomit up the battery. Why does this always happen to me?
there is such a gross feeling of satisfaction when the married guy i used to hook up with likes my facebook status.
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