Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
I guess our biggest consolation is that we haven't woken up in a hottub with a dead dude. Yet.
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
His grandpa picked him up. Brought him to the house. And made him clean the puke off the driveway with a broom and a bucket of water.
Look at the picture I MADE him take with me...like why??? He's holding my foot?
Then he unzipped his pants and whispers, " oohhh, look out!"
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
His dick is curly. It's adorable.
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
Randomize
