8:17pm: So, How was fun day?
1:15am: So I just woke up in my bed in my bathing suit... I don't remember getting into bed or dinner or anything after slip n slide that happened around five... I'd say fun day was a success
epic walk of shame this morning involving 2 subway transfers. I need to start sexing locally.
did the hipsters beat you up because you are more ironic than they are?
i just got a fart via voicenote. blackberry has officially changed history.
well on a positive note i hear those vitamins you take while pregnant do wonders for your nails
Walmart at night is scary enough without having to run into people you've slept with
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
I puked up my nose. THAT kind of night
You looked at me, said I was a nice guy. Then you drunkenly climbed on top of me and said you liked me and wanted me.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I might go to an NA meeting just to fuck that boy in the bathroom.
I'm over here willing to be the Yoda of fucking but I guess he just doesn't want to be a Jedi.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
A drunk frat boy just jumped on the hood of my car while I was driving down Bridge St. He yelled at me to keep going since he was playing frogger and needed another car to jump on... or a log. I hate this town.
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