How did people poop without Blackberrys?
Motorola Razers?
Stone age, man.
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
She didn't know my name but she knew I was Canadian so she just called me Canada. It sounded like the national anthem when we were fucking.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
I am VERY upset that you called my fiesta a waste of time.
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Also, did you really start discussing the weather in the middle of telling you my sexual fantasy about you?
I literally just force feed a guy flintstone vitamins after sex
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
she threw up on her exam, awkwardly wiped it off with her sleeve and continued writing.
To the woman who just heard me unscrew my flask in the Denny's women's bathroom at 10am: discretion isn't required but greatly appreciated.
Did you at least share?
Randomize
