would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
Just TALKING to him is better than banging my bf, imagine what actual banging will be like.
I told him we can only be friends from now on & he said he knows but that I'm the 'best he ever had'.
you slept with him again didn't you
you can't just quote Drake AND compliment me at the same time & receive nothin. he knows me too well
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Yes, I am about to pass out on my beanbag with a mason jar of wine. Welcome to the south freshmen.
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
I can't believe you're asking me to think of a sincere, creative way to apologize to your penis at 2 am.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
I find celibacy oppressive. Huge waste of my time and talents.
So I just saw someone get shoved into a car trunk by your car.
Mom saw my dick pic over my gf's shoulder. She told her she really should've had me circumcised.
She looked like a cross between Jesus and John Lennon. So I fucked her. I feel majestic and powerful.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
