Yeah, I tried playing the "see how long he can stay inside of me" game.. And I lost.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
I've reached the slutty point of no return. And it feels like multiple orgasms and coke lines
Its official. I've reentered slutty territory. I was a condom away from having sex in a childs playhouse at a park. Oh and I lost my car keys.
you know I love you but I need to see your friends tits
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
I was having trouble getting it up so she grabbed it and said "no, it's too big to fail"
We are not in a rock band. We can't continue living like this.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
She said she had a surprise for me and sent me a video of her having sex with some fat dude. It was a mood killer
Like not to be gross, he was eating me out while I was smoking a bowl. It was like a rap video
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
when i woke up with 300+ messages I didn't except them to be about coyotes and burning shoes.
You've hit rock bottom, swam around the ocean floor, and brought back silverware from the titanic.
as I was leaving in the morning with his clothes on his roommate pops up and goes 'don't you dare steal that shirt, i gave it to him for his birthday'.
Randomize
