Porn is love you can see.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
Thank God for cruise control and the Starbucks cup I had to puke in.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
Just now remembered singing Trashy Women at the reception. Not karaoke, just sang along with the mic I stole from the DJ. All while still in my dress drinking champagne from the bottle
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
It's simple. He fucks me at his place and I fuck him at my place. It's like man of the house gets to top.
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
Stay calm. It's a titty bar. A ring of cocaine will protect you.
Just had a threesome with a married couple.
Stop living my dream.
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