they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
Just got mistaken for a cardboard cutout ad in line at Taco Bell. New low?
she just convinced the cop to buy us ice-cream sandwiches. best/worst stoned experience ever.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
I'm lost. Please come find me. I'm inside the I-270 circle somewhere. I can hear laughing.
You know it was a good weekend when; you leave a bi-lingual letter of apology on top of a stack of cash for hotel housekeeping.
Thanks man, but unless some hot chick comes in to work with a case of beer and offers me a head job, I'm pretty much screwed for New Years
MAYDAY. glass in foot, have crush on guy with mullet.life is over.
In other news I have discovered that grindr is the easiest way to get free meals
I had a face to face conversation with her vagina, asking it not to make me look bad.
spending today hungover and untagging myself from all the pictures of me kissing girls so grandma doesnt have a heart attack. how was your new years?
I want your cock.
All we are is dust in the wiiiiiiinnnnnnnnnnd
steve's beating me 4-2 in our "sexually confusing straight people" competition. steve is a wizard. this is not a drill.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
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