Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
Why does Corona taste like a burp?
knew i was gonna lose at a shoe or be bleeding at some point. and both happened within 20 mins.
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Ok so in the last 18 months I have now driven four different dudes into counseling. I'm like heroin with a vagina.
Please rescue me. but take your time, im getting pizza
He stared me down while singing "Let Me Love You" to me while we were having sex. I don't know whether to marry him or file a restraining order.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
She super glued his penis to his testicles. And shaved off a good portion of his hair after he passed out at the party.
she wouldnt leave because they were playing One Direction. I'm dating a thirteen year old.
Randomize
