doesn't he have a GF?
that just means you have to try harder.
i didn't have to try TOO hard, just told him i didn't want to know his name or...
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
tequila makes my crab dance SOOOO much better
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Well, I guess that settles the question of how thick the walls are in my building.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I am three bowls, two beers, and a muscle relaxer into babysitting. What are you doing.
I've never seen a grown man cry so much after getting jerked off by a stripper. I say it's the best $600 he ever spent.
...Just between you and me I just did Olympic grade ribbon dancing with toilet paper in the bar bathroom.
I'm going to try to ignore the homoerotic subtext in that last question...
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
friends are allowed to bang on New Years, I read it on the Internet somewhere.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
I can see. My condolences to your vagina.
Randomize