bl l w
this should be fun to decipher. I'd like to buy a vowel.
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
I'm returning our mountain of beer cans, while wearing a Budweiser sweatshirt. i don't look like an alcoholic.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
i wish i could shrink down to the size of his dick so i could just thank it in person.
had to go back to that apartment this morning to get my other boot. it was tacked to the wall
Chicken strips. I got my nose broken because of Chicken strips.
My roommate was tripping balls last night, he kept me up all fucking night
Roommate? Please tell me you're not calling your cat your roommate
direct quote from andrew "you know i can't hear when i drink whiskey"
I'm full of champagne and rage, of course I'm showing up at his house.
I am not a slut. I'm just very open with how much I love to have sex. Stop judging.
Showed up to the airport to find my fuck buddy is on the same flight. Do you think he'd be intertested in the mile high club?
I've slapped too many boys and done too many naked laps for it only to be 10:30pm
april was a good month for me, sexually...doubled my number, had a threesome, fucked a girl for the first time and two different boys in one night. there should be a medal
Randomize
