I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
i think our first tip to leave should have been when we saw the drinks were coming out of a gas can
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
Call 911 I'm faking my own death so this fat chick leaves my room
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
pretty sure the dicks i sucked were punishment enough
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I'm gonna forget you just shared your personal blowjob aesthetic with me and move on
Just ignore the penis. It's won't bother you. I promise.
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
I had a threesome with my hot neighbor and his GF and by threesome I mean I heard them getting it on in their apartment and I was in my apartment with a vibrator
and I may have moaned his name loud enough that they heard me because now he won’t make eye contact
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