i always forget guys have bellybuttons
I went down on her for at least a half hour, She loved it, so I thought she'd recip. She said "I only do that if I know I'm getting something out of it."
SHUT IT DOWN.
Do you think my parents will accept my drinking habits more if I told them I like to drink every night because I take good shits the next morning?
I'm pretty sure he told me he was sterile and I told him I was on the pill. The positive pregnancy test I'm holding in my hand right now tells me that at least one of us was lying.
He referred to his cock as "The cock" like it was third party or something.
just cheers'ed a flock of cattle as i drove past eating a burger i bought 7 hours ago. that high.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
I need to stop ravaging the freshman dorm like a virginity-snatching dragon.
He walked in at 7am saying that the police had his shoes and phone because he's being investigated for attempted auto theft.
There's a bus with a band full of dancing women in bras. I think I like it here.
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
There is a severe lack of banging on that itinerary... I'd like a revision on my desk within the hour
I've spent hours masturbating before. It's actually my favorite Sunday activity
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Randomize