thanks for being my friend even though im irresponsible with my vagina
Call me at 7:30 and make sure I'm not asleep in this booth at Waffle House.
you kept slapshing your drinks on people saying the power of christ compels you.
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
holy fuck that shirt looks so good on him, it was like he was born with it on. that shirt deserves a blow
I don't want anything to do with the Darth Vader stripper babe. I'm just trying to make dreams come true.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I used the line "you don't have enough pillows". Then left. Thought you should know.
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
Randomize
