It was still light ouot when we were walking up Pier Ave and she kept asking if she could suck my nipples.
And that's when he stuck his finger up his own ass to prove it would feel good...
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
Two girls I have never met just thumb wrestled to decide who gets to make out with me.
You totally left a blue butt print on our banister
Well I think we can all agree that that's better than then bowl of puke I left last time.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
I am currently google image searching dick piercings, trying to see what I'm getting myself into.
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
the story is to long to tell you via txt so when you notice the tattoo on your ass call me.
Chick last night said she only gets off if she rubs her childhood blanket her parents gave her during sex
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
pretend your vagina is a choco taco and the guy is someone who really loves choco tacos. let him enjoy the choco taco.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I just got high off one hit and the. Spent 20 minutes inspecting the gasket of our refridgerator and researching ways to replace it
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
Randomize
