Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
how does a 20 year old who hasnt gone through puberty yet score the game winning goal? fuck sidney crosby and his small nuts.
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
I love you and want you to know that you're the best friend ever and me lassoing you with a seatbelt was out of sheer affection.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
Ps. The strap-on in the pic i sent you last night was not mine. Just wanted to clear that up.
I had a dream last night where I used the marginal product rule to figure out how much more hangover I got per sip of four loko, econ is taking over my life...
Like I've never seen her that drunk. She's usually like quiet and doesn't say she'll fuck someone on a futon
literally just blacked in. Im watching what to expect when your expecting, eating pretzels and peanut butter, and I have someone's underwear around my neck.
Well, he asked what my sign was, then proceeded to critique me on my beer pong stance... I really need to raise my standards.
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
the fact you finally accept your bi don't shock me but as your fuck buddy I expect you girls to go family style on me
His 89 y/o father walked in on us. Judging by the gasp/moan, I don't think the 1920s prepared him to see another dude inside his son.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
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