Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
tequila makes her clothes fall off
wow Mom, sounds like youre having a good time
They're having chugging contests. With juice. Please get me out of Utah.
I don't understand why everytime I fuck his bestfriend he seems more interested in me...
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
There's a stripper banging on the door demanding to see you.
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
Sometimes things go your way and sometimes you get hit on by a fat drunk girl.
AND FUCKING MGMT JUST CAME ON. CAN I GO DROWN MYSELF IN LESBIANS OR SOMETHING? IS IT TIME TO LESBIAN
we're fated to lesbian
This juggling 3 dicks is getting exhausting
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
Randomize
