you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
Im holding a competition......who saw me last, and who knows how my nose got bruised? you earn points for answering either question. and for bringing me water.
There I was staring at a teeny weeny black one and a huge white one. It was like an episode of Myth Busters
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
To be so small, the mini-horses are exceptionally aggressive. And fast. Very, very fast.
Abort! Abort! He almost bit off a finger!
If you want me to retract my crazy cat lady comments pictures of yourself dressed as a cat are not the way to do it.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
but I have boobs. I'm not going to buy my own drinks at the bar like some kind of fucking animal.
There's a set of buzz lightyear wings in lost and found at work. I just need access to your roof.
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
Drunk within and hour of coming home from work, merry christmas bitch
Randomize
